Monster Monday: Ode to the Licker, Resident Evil 2, 1998

It’s a new year, so we’re relaunching Monster Mondays with a twist – over the next few weeks we’ll use a more creative take on the monsters of the week. Poems, stories (very short ones) and occasional critiques. So this time, it’s a poem – a short one, slightly tongue in cheek…

This week’s feature – the Licker from Resident Evil 2 in 1998. Aware that this is not the only time that the Licker has appeared in the series, but this was the first time we’d seen it and its initial impact was very significant when first playing this awesome game. Good times.


Ode to the Licker

I’m dead again
You leapt at Claire Redfield
Squish squish chomp
Strangled from above
Playing Resi2,
What a revelation you were
So scary to us
Oh Mr Licker
Your tongue is so
I hear you sighing, feet clacking
How do you find your way
To jump out at me
When you have no eyes
And an exposed brain?
Here’s a hat
Let’s be friends?
Think I preferred
The zombies

Monster Monday: The Infected in ‘The Last of Us’ (PS3 game)

We’ve seen our fair share of zombie flicks here at the Eyeball. In fact, we were pretty sure no mere zombie could ever terrify us again.

Naughty Dog (creators of the Nathan Drake adventure games) have proved us wrong.


Half man, half homicidal mushroom

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The Monsters (2004) Short film Dir. Tony Potter

The Monsters Poster

Do you like scary silly movies? This is for you!

The internet can take you to some odd places. I was looking at the cast list for last year’s popular video game, L.A. Noire, and clicked, more or less at random, on J D Cullum. Turns out he did this crazy little short film inbetween an 2004 season of ’24’ and while starring in ‘Judging Amy’.  I’m not sure how actors get into these short movies, but it’s a funny movie following the story that a kid makes up at  camp fire. I think they may have made this in their lunch breaks, actually.

The story is pretty simple, reminds me of Stephen King’s ‘Boogeyman’ story, only played for laughs. Monsters invade a man’s house, hiding in his closet and eating everyone he sends in there, including cops, although some think he should be in the ‘loony bin’. Remember, this is basically a story made up on the spot by a kid. The acting isn’t bad, hammy and tongue firmly in cheek, and if you’re in the mood for some low budget and endearingly silly ‘horror’ then there are definitely worse ways to spend about eight-and-a-half minutes online.

I can’t find it on youtube, but here’s the link to the site where I found it.