Jacked Off…I’m SO sorry….


End of 24.

SPOILERS! GET THE DVDS! OR DON’T BOTHER FOR THIS SEASON! WAIT FOR THE MOVIE! WATCH HEROES!

It truly is over, folks.

It sucked.

To begin with:

  • Jack Bauer somehow failing resolve things with his evil-evil-evil father (who should have been played by his real dad, Donald Sutherland, but isn’t for reasons only conspiracy theorists can comprehend).
  • Brainy geeeeek hotty Chloe falling over, then falling pregnant. Okay, probably NOT in that order…
  • Jack turning up at catatonic Audrey’s house about ten seconds after falling off a helicopter into the ocean
  • No Tony Almeida, even though I hadn’t heard the rumours until afterwards. We need someone back who we actually CARE about, damnit (take a drink)
  • We still don’t know what price was paid for Jack’s release from China
  • Decisively turning Jack back into the season 4 asshole who got people killed and killed and hurt people randomly
  • Will he jump? Won’t he? Of course he bloody won’t, he’s signed onto 24 for THE REST OF TIME!

Note that these are just things I had a problem with in the FINALÉ. For the reasons I outline in my previous post, this series sucked. A lot. Anything after the first nuke going off was patchy at best, and when they actually got the bad guys about six episodes before the 24th hour, it became clear there were problems. Then the production team actually admitted it. Then we kept watching, because we’d already watched it, and wanted to find out:

  • Is Jack’s nephew actually his son?
  • Is he going to get one over his evil-evil-evil father?
  • Will he get over his imprisonment in China (well, he did. Really soon)?
  • Is there another big bad at the end?
  • Do we even care about poor Audrey?

And the answer is……

Go on. Work it out. Sorry, but this was just a huge waste of time!

I repeat my plea to let the writers have a break, (oooh, writer’s strike soon), and then make the movie okay (and not The Sentinel 2). And then, just, enjoy yourselves. Please.

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